One moment I was in primary school thinking of how to pass secondary school entrance exam, and now I’m caught up between the choice of the right spouse; Oyin or Sandra? There’s certainly no doubt that time waits for no one and within a twinkle of an eye, your youth follows the time. While I’ll not be talking about my love life, these are ten types of men that will continue to waste your time.
1. The commitment phobe: Just as kryptonite is to Superman, so also is commitment to many men. Yet at some point they have to get committed if they really care about you. This type of guy has phobia for commitment and is just ok with being friends with benefit. He withdraws when things start to get serious or when you start to push for more commitment. Unless that’s what you want from him at that moment, you’re bound to have your time wasted by him and probably end up as an insignificant addition to his body count.
2. He’s just not that into you: Between this and unrequited love, I don’t know which is more painful to the heart. But one thing I’m sure of is that being involved with a guy that’s not all that into you will hurt you in so many ways. You’ll always seek for his approval, nag, give 100% and get peanuts in return, have your self esteem drop to the lowest and go through a roller coaster of emotions. You’re good enough for any man, he just doesn’t like you that much and that’s not your fault, so move on to save yourself from the emotional trauma.
3. Hot and cold: One moment he makes you feel like the queen of the universe, other times he ignores you like you don’t matter. One moment he is always the first to message you consistently, other times he doesn’t take back. One moment you’re having high hopes about your relationship; next thing is that you find yourself doubting if you both have a future together. This guy blows hot and cold, and he’s very inconsistent. He will go AWOL on you and reappear like nothing happened. This not only wastes your time, but also puts you in a ever changing emotional state that is not healthy.
4. The Flake: it’s one thing for him to cancel plans due to an emergency, but when it becomes frequent this is not the kind of guy you want to have a relationship with. He priorities other things than you, and he is not willing to compromise or make sacrifices to take you out, give you attention and be with you.
5. Men who don’t know what they want: it’s totally normal not to have everything figured out all the time. But at least one should have some sense of direction. This type of guy probably still lives with his parents at the age of 35, and is not passionate about his career or business. While there are successful men that don’t know what they want, one thing is general to them; when a man doesn’t know what he wants, you can be certain he’s not sure if you’re the one for him and you’re just probably a laboratory rat.
6. Keeps letting you down: You’ve forgiven this guy more than 70 times 7 times as recommended in the bible, yet he keeps letting you down and you keep forgiving. He cheats, lies, embarrasses you and keeps disappointing you. For some reason, whether love or lust, you put up with him. This kind of man will not change and will only continue to waste your time and drain you.
7. Still into his ex: While it’s OK to have a healthy relationship with your ex it’s so not cool getting into a relationship and having your emotions for your ex interfere. I know many of us are inclined to go back to our ex which is not a bad thing because you probably broke up for stupid reasons. Yet no one should get into new relationships without resolving his/her emotions with a said ex. If it’s impossible for the perfect man to give you his 100% you can be certain of not getting 50% from a man that’s still into his ex. Not only will he waste your time, he’s likely to cheat on you with the ex and leave you for the ex. He’s probably a member of the X-men, hehehehe..
8. Mr. Shut her up with commitment: Men know women want commitment and there are certain guys that won’t be ready in 15 years yet don’t want to lose you. So he spoon feeds you with commitment till you’re full. Chances are you’ve met his family and ancestors but years and years continue to pass and there’s no real progress in the relationship. He might even be selfish enough to propose just to make sure you continue to be his. Eventually that precious engagement ring becomes a key holder.
9. The social media buddy: Social Media has really made many people unproductive. If every minute we spent on irrelevant conversations was used to do important work, a lot would have been achieved in the world. So you get along, he’s funny, interesting and cool. But don’t go assuming you’ve built a strong relationship. Online conversations can’t be replaced with real ones, and he’s probably texting you from his girlfriend’s house. Worse he might not be who you think he is. So if there’s no progress on moving beyond social media lovers, you’ll just keep wasting your time.
10. Not interested: We all need to understand that not everyone can like you and it’s not your fault. It’s just their preference, and it’s just the same way you turn some guys down because they are not what you want. This is best explained by this quote; “you can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches” –Dita Von Teese. So move on and don’t force anyone to love you. He’s the one unfortunate to miss out on a great lady.
Time is truly previous and this can’t be overemphasized. That single man that is wasting your time is like a spec of dust on a beach, when compared to the millions of good men out there, so move beyond men that don’t value you, and invest more in men that will make your time and effort to be worthwhile. Cheers!!