HOW NOT TO MESS UP YOUR FIRST DATE

By Tayo-Trendz

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When it comes to the dating game, I try as much as possible not to blame the men. We never had a pre-knowledge of how to court these beautiful, charming, yet intimidating feminine creatures. All we know we owe to trial and error, experience and the little we pick from societal observation. The need or want of getting a spouse then slaps us in the face. The planets line up in a straight line, a lady is
met and a date is set. Positive first impressions matter. A first date is like a joint visit to a fortune teller. The likelihood of any future relationship will be ascertained. Here are some tips on how not to mess it up.

SPRUCE UP

No proper lady likes a shabby sleaze ball, the moment she notices, the moment you kill your chances with her.  Your first impression is mostly like the lasting impression that will linger in her mind. So spruce up, be neat, clean and hygienic. Keep a neat haircut, dress to suite the occasion, use good cologne and speak proper grammar as you won’t want to speak something so grammatically preposterousthat will turn her off. Concisely be at your best.

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THE ALPHA EGO OF TAKING CHARGE

It’s almost certain you’re the one that asked her to go on a date with you, because like seriously, what are the odds of she asking you? It becomes important to plan the date well as it speaks volume on how organized you are. Women love it when a man acts like a man and takes charge of the date, not one who will leave all the decisions to them, like what to do? Where to go? Where to meet? What to eat? In the process you could possibly embarrass her and make her feel uncomfortable. So grow a pair and show her why you’re an Alpha male.

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TAKING BABY STEPS

It’s your first time out, probably the first time of seeing her, so don’t go scaring her off by taking things too fast. Women are body language experts so they can smell your desperation from miles away. So take baby steps, let the interaction proceed naturally with ease. You wouldn’t want to come across as “ pervy” , touching her in her hot zones even when you’re yet to build a connection or probably professing your love to her then and there. You’ll just end up avoiding you like a plague. 

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GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS

Communication is key in a relationship. To build a connection, you need to have good conversation with her and that’s where good communication skills come in. Contents of a good conversation involves active listening, taking your partner along, getting interested in her and not just talking about yourself and other irrelevances. You also don’t want to give her too much info or bore her with irrelevances like your family history that she just doesn’t need to know yet. She’s still new to you, quite cautious and her defenses are high. So what best way to break the ice other than with humour. Use humour to warm your way into her heart and build a connection. A good sense of humour makes you interesting and you can be sure as hell that all women love a man that can make them laugh. Moderation is also important as you do not want to come off as a jester or clown.
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AVOIDING PRETENSE AND SHOWBOATING

One thing that comes with lying is that you always have to cover it up with another lie until it becomes an unforgivable long thread of lies when discovered. As said earlier, ladies are experts at reading people and body language so don’t go trying too hard to impress or opening doors if it’s really not your thing, they can always see through the lies, pretense and façade thereby killing your chances with them. Humility is a great virtue and actions obviously speaks louder than words so be the guy that shows her why he is a great guy not a guy that tells her why he is. Showboating gets you nowhere. Telling her of how wealthy you’re, how often you travel and properties you own might get you a gold digger but will definitely disgust a proper lady. So come clean, be humble and go natural in your dealings with her. That way she likes you for you and eventually when she finds out of your worth, it will have a greater effect than rubbing it firsthand in her face and she will respect you for it.
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BE CONFIDENT

Calm your nerves, she’s probably just as shy or nervous as you’re, but you need to show confidence in all interactions with her. Though her looks may be intimidating and her eyes may seem to be piercing your very soul, still communicate with fluency, maintain good eye contact, be assertive and handle most of the decision making. Every woman likes a confident man, so be secure and positive in your interaction because confident people are naturally attractive with the Alpha male qualities they display.
Never get too ahead of yourself, not all dates can be huge success, she might even turn out to be someone you don’t even want anything to do with but play your part well and leave a good lasting impression.

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